Divorce Is Not The End Of The World

Years ago, two psychiatrists, Dr. Thomas Holmes, and Dr. Richard Rahe came up with a stress scale based on their evaluation of 43 different life events. They determined that the death of a spouse was the most stressful life event and second was divorce.

Losing a Marriage Requires a Grieving Process

divorce and the end of the world

When you first enter your attorney’s office to begin the divorce process, you are more-or-less in shock. You are in a situation you never expected to be in. Divorce was not on your mind when you got married no matter how many years ago that was. Your emotions are high and it’s hard to think clearly and rationally.

You are experiencing the loss of your marriage and will go through the grieving process, the same as people do with any loss. There are stages of grief you have to go through like you have to go through for every loss. A support system is almost mandatory.

A Support System Can Help with the Feeling That Your World is Ending

The main thing that will help you through this difficult time is a support system. This can be:

  • Your pastor, if you are religious, may be very helpful.
  • A Counselor or some sort of mental health professional. Some people resist getting help from a mental health professional because they think there is a stigma to that but as the years go by, more people are acknowledging the benefit of counseling. It can be very helpful for a divorcing spouse who is going through the divorce process.
  • A loving family member. Do not make your children your support system! They need to be kept neutral and you should not lean on them. They are children and should not ever be put in the middle nor burdened with adult problems. If you have a sibling or parent who you trust and feel comfortable with, that might be a good support system.
  • A mental health counselor can also help the couple learn how to co-parent.

Divorce is clearly a stressful time. Having a good support system will help you to get through it. Your world is changing but it is not the end of the world and there will be brighter days ahead.

For more information on what it means to have a lawyer with a heart contact Martinez Legal, P.C.