How to Know When it is Time to Consider Divorce


Every marriage goes through a rough patch. Couples have “highs” and “lows,” and many make it through to the other side and regain their happiness with each other. For others, there is no hope of “fixing” the marriage and there comes a time when divorce may be the only option. How to know when that time has come may not be easy.

Common Signs it is Time to Consider Divorce

The most common sign is the breakdown of communication. Some other indications you should consider divorce include but are not limited to the following:

  • You and your spouse have tried marriage counseling to no avail. You still regularly argue with each other even when you know intellectually your spouse’s position has merit.
  • You no longer desire to remain living in the same household as your spouse.
  • You find it difficult to say anything positive about your spouse.
  • Every argument turns into a “blame game.”
  • There is more negativity on a daily basis than there is positivity.
  • You no longer feel your spouse is your friend.
  • You fantasize about living your life alone, living without your spouse.

If this description fits how you feel about your marriage, it is time to consult a divorce attorney.

When to Leave the Marriage

Before you take the final step of filing for divorce, consult with a divorce attorney. An attorney can help you decide when to move out and what you need to consider before moving out. With the holidays fast approaching, you may want to wait.  For instance, if you and your spouse can tolerate being together for the sake of the children, then it might be a good idea to call a truce and wait until after the holidays to physically separate, so the family has one last holiday with the parents together.

On the other hand, if tensions are so high that you feel you need to separate before the holidays, it can make the holiday season more peaceful if you go ahead and move out, or have your spouse move out, before the holidays.  Again, we always recommend speaking with a divorce attorney to help you weigh all options.

If family violence is involved, you have no choice. It is time to separate from the person who is perpetuating the violence.

For consultation with an attorney to discuss if this is the right time to proceed with a divorce, call or contact us at Martinez Legal, P.C. We recognize that each case is different. We work closely with our clients so that they can make the right decisions with respect to their unique legal needs.